in the dark...

"Keep thou my feet;

I do not ask to see the distant scene-

One step enough for me....

I loved to choose and see my path;

but now, lead thou me on."

I have no idea where I'm going to be in the next 4-7 months of my life.

I thought I did...up until about a month ago.

Now I'm just a little bit confused.

All I want to do is whatever Heavenly Father wants me to do!

I'm sincerely trying to figure out what exactly that is, and trying to let one step at a time be enough for me. That song at the top of this entry is what I'm striving for.

It's just hard though! Imagine a room that's pitch black with only me in it. My task is to find the door. Picture me with my hands out in front of me, repeatedly bumping into the walls, struggling to know which way to go....and welcome to my life right now!

In my blessing that I got before school, it says that I'm not shown the whole path but turn by turn, I'll be instructed to my destination. That, coupled with previous experiences, reassures me that Heavenly Father's looking out for me and He's going to put me where He needs me to be. That brings me some comfort.

Still...not knowing where you're going is SCARY. However, I know that walking by faith requires moving...so walls in that dark room, meet Alicia. I have a feeling we're going to be really good friends by the time I finally find that door.

just a little bit of bragging...

I would just like to say that yesterday, I resisted eating an entire pack of M&Ms and 2 cupcakes (CUPCAKES!!!!) that were offered to me on separate occasions. Yes, please feel free to applaud. :)

Hooray for sticking with New Years Resolutions!

hello 2010!

Dear 2010,

HELLO! Sorry that it has taken almost 3 weeks for me to acknowledge your presence in my life. It's been a little bit crazy since I've been back in the bubble that is Provo.

Life is so good right now!

I'm in the second semester of the Elementary Education major, aka the 1st Cohort. Basically, that means I have pretty much all my classes with the same 30 people. It's kind of nice but I miss all of my other friends from the arts semester that aren't in the Provo cohort! My classes include: El Ed 302 (Planning and Management), El Ed 351 (Multicultural Education), Mth Ed 306 (Concepts of Math), El Ed 356 (Teaching Reading and Language Arts), IP&T 301 (Educational Psychology) and IP&T 287 (Instructional Technology in Teaching).

They aren't so bad. I especially like Wednesdays and Fridays because I only have 1 class and it's done at 9:00 am! Last week on Wednesday, I got up and ran around the track for 40 minutes before class and then went to the temple right after class. It was probably the best day of the week. I'm hoping to keep that up for the rest of the semester.

Church is...hmm...how to describe it?

awesome. crazy. long. so so uplifting. more enjoyable than it's ever been before. energizing. rewarding.

This semester I have the blessing of serving as one of the 3 Relief Society presidents in my ward. Although I was really intimidated by the calling when they first told me at the end of November, I feel better about it now. I mean, I feel a lot of responsiblity on my shoulders but can I tell you something?

I HAVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER.

I feel so much love in my life: my Heavenly Father's love for me, His love for the girls that are in my Relief Society, my love for those girls and all those around me... it is honestly the most incredible feeling I've ever felt. I don't really know how to describe it. This feeling of charity has just filled up my whole body. I feel like my heart can't hold it all in. Don't think I'm weird...the feelings actually pretty amazing.

Anyways, I have to go now to take advantage of my holiday and do the homework that I procrastinated...woohoo. (Not.)

Oh, p.s. guess what random thing I'm doing this semester?
Inner tube waterpolo.
That's not a joke. I have no idea how it's even played. Hahaha I must say, I'm pretty stoked to look like a complete idiot.

Here's to a most excellent 2010...I'm feeling like it's got great things in store for me!

Love you all!

Leash

can i just say....

that I have the best mom EVER?

Okay, well, it's official: My mom is the best.

I have been laying around being disgusting since my wisdom teeth were torn out of my gums on Monday morning. For two and a half days, I have sat around in the same sweats and tank top, with no make up and bad breath, and she has been sitting here with me watching probably literally 15 movies....Enchanted, Legally Blonde, You've Got Mail, Hercules, Hannah Montana Movie, Julie and Julia, Mulan, Pride and Predjudice, Ratatouille, Sweet Home Alabama, Narnia, WhileYou Were Sleeping, and Anastasia. Okay so maybe that's only 12 but whatever.

She's also been making/serving me soft foods that I can eat like yogurt, smoothies, Spaghettios, cheesecake pudding, blue jello, Jamba Juice, and mashed potatoes and has been medicating me every few hours.

Bottom Line: She is great and I love her so much it's ridiculous.

the greatest time of year.

Christmastime is an amazing time. This year, for me, it was the chance to sit back and to see how blessed I truly am.

As I unwrapped present after present and surrounded myself with new things, I thought about the ever-present gift of my Savior's love and Atonement in my life and wondered if I'm unwrapping that special gift and using it as frequently as I should.

Undoubtedly, reopening that gift and generously applying it to my life is something that I need to always work on. This is the gift that really lasts, that endures forever.

This is the gift that I want to share with everyone!

so close...

Less than two days.

I only have to make it 45 more hours until I receive a small, short break for once in my life.

I CAN DO IT!

a letter.

Dear world,

If you could stop expecting me to do so much in the next 10 days that would be really, really, REALLY nice.

Lots of love,
Alicia